What Next? It's Not an End, It's Just another Chapter.

I love school supplies. I love fresh new notebooks and sharpened pencils. In the years after college graduation, I always looked longingly at the Target Back to school ads. I wished that I had a need for a new trapper keeper.

That is until I became the mother of a school aged student.

School supplies and Back to School ads take on a whole new meaning as a mother. It's a sign that you are ushering in a new year. Who really thinks of January as the beginning of the year? All of my calendars start in September.

This is one of those milestones years. Miss M will head to the middle school and Miss A will head off to kindergarten. We are ushering in a whole new lifestyle around these part in which all the children go off to school all day.

In many ways, I've been thinking about this day all summer, the day that I drop A off at the elementary school and walk out alone and go home to an empty house. I've had countless people ask me what I plan to do with myself now. What will I do to fill up all the time? Have I thought about getting a job?

It's as if they are asking me what will I do with myself now that I am no longer needed. No more fixing lunches for little ones, no rushing to the grocery store while the preschooler is in school, no more arranging play dates around nap time, and no going to the park in the morning while the big kids are in school and the playground is quiet.

The implication is that my job is done. I've finished parenting my children and now it's the teachers' job to fill in the gaps and shape them into the adults society wants them to be. It's as if I'm turning them over to someone else and I'm not really needed except to drive car pool and help pack lunches.

I think in many ways my job is even more important now. Being available for my children while they are in the elementary and junior high years is critical. These are the years they will remember forever. The time in their lives in which their character, values, morals and beliefs about who they are are formed, modified, and molded. Being there for them on sick days, hanging out on day's off, countering the culture they are exposed to each day with Godly wisdom.

A few years ago my son was the target of a bully on the bus. I didn't know about it, he kept it to himself. It was subtle and he was trying to be strong. Whenever we talked about school and friends, he said everything was fine, no problems. The day before Christmas Break, I was sitting in the family room working on some last minute Christmas presents. The school bus dropped Mr. C off at the bottom of the hill and he walked through the front door and I could just tell something was not right. By God's provision, I had made homemade Chocolate Chip Cookies that day and had them ready in the kitchen for C's arrival.

I put aside my project, sat down, and asked again for the 100th time that school year; "How was your day?" This time, the response was different. The waterworks opened and he told me the whole story of the bullying on the bus.

Had I not been there? Had I not asked all the previous days before how his day was and waited for his answer each time, I might not have gotten the response I did that December afternoon.

All the previous days and the years before had allowed C and I to have that moment when I could look into his eyes and "know" something was off.

I'm so glad I'd made the investment in time. So glad that I had often put aside what I wanted to do for me to be there.

That's why on Monday when I come home alone, I'll be OK. I know deep down that this is not an end to my parenting job, but it's just another curve in the road. A change of direction.

Sure I'll be getting a lot more "projects" done during the day, I'll be able to volunteer my time, I'll go back to BSF and not worry about preschool pick up or have to arrange childcare for lunches with girlfriends. Without a doubt, I'll be available from 2:40 p.m. everyday. Those "bewitching" hours after school and before dinner and activities will be precious time to reconnect, redirect and focus on my kids.

I'll have tons of time during the day to do things for me and others, that time will be just for them!!

WFMW: Kindergarten Roundup the Redshirt Year

Miss A picked out her outfit for the event: her new Justice Shirt, a cool purple scarf and of course those fabulous sparkly shoes. Don't think other girls didn't notice the "sparkle." She said that the first thing her Kindergarten Buddy said to her was "I love the sparkly."

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Miss A's "redshirt" year is half way over. It's hard to believe that next year at this time the house will be silent and empty in the afternoons. We've been having lots of fun this fall and have some big ideas of things to do this spring. We just need the weather man to help us out a little bit!

Last week, our elementary school held it's Kindergarten Round Up. Now don't ask me why they felt the need to do this in the middle of January when the 2010-2011 school year is 8 months away, but they did!! Of course, all this week Miss A has been asking when does Kindergarten start again.

Since this is my third time through Round Up, I was prepared. I had my little birth certificate in hand, a camera in my purse, and a set of pens ready to fill out all the forms. If pressed into service, I could give the "Welcome to our school speech" the Principal gave without notes. But I loved looking around at the "newbies" who are getting ready to send child number one out into the world. The parents looked almost as nervous as the children.

Miss A was all confident and ready. She walked right out with her "class" or practice class as she called it to see the Kindergarten classroom, do a craft, and have a snack. She loved it. However, she'd like to make it clear that this is not the teacher she's going to have in the fall. Remember that mom!! I guess she's under the impression she gets to pick and that she'll get to pick a few of her "friends" to be in her class, too!

Going through roundup once again and seeing the other kids, the look of confidence on Miss A's face reaffirmed our decision to hold her back a year and wait to start Kindergarten. She seems much more confident, excited, and ready now than she was last spring or summer. Sure she's a little taller than some of the kids in the class, but she also showed some real leadership holding another little girl's hand as they walked away from the cafeteria.

When we got back in the car to head home that morning, the first thing A said was; "well that's over now, let's go home I'm exhausted." Guess it's tough being a pretend Kindergartner for a morning. It reminded me to enjoy these last few months of freedom that we will have together to soak up our time together and play games, read books and go out to lunch with the ladies. Miss A was so excited to get her own Dry Erase Board and Pen and has been copying down "words" ever since.




Gotta go now, Little House in the Big Woods is calling my and Miss A's name.


Kindergarten Roundup during our Redshirt Year Works for Me; for more WFMW check out We Are THAT Family.

First Day means Freedom and Scruffy Puppy

M on the first day of 4th Grade. C on the first day of 7th Grade. Both kids had also had the obligatory picture with the "sign" and the backpack photo on the steps. Tradition!

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Yesterday was the first day of school. According to both kids it was fun and boring. Great to see friends, find out who was new in class, meet the new teachers and for C find his way around the 7th grade part of the building.

The boring part was hearing all the rules, filling out the forms and not really doing anything all day. Guess the filling out forms was the mother's boring part along with writing all the checks for PTA/PTO memberships, activity cards, lunch accounts and so on and so forth.

At least today, M said they would have "real school". C just gets to go to his even day schedule of classes and hear the same rules speeches again. I'm anxious to hear about Gym Class and the rules for clothes in 7th grade. I still remember my lovely red polyester outfit from Junior High Gym. Yuck!

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On top of all that they served hot dogs for lunch at the elementary school. M says that ruined the theory that the serve great food the first week to entice you to try the food. She went with her lunch box today! At the junior high, there was the "deli line" and they, for the first time in Monday history, had pepperoni. For the past two years that has been C's complaint at his lunch with the principal. Pepperoni only on Tuesday and Thursday. Yesterday was a "miracle". C of course thinks that maybe his pleas have at last been heard and he will leave his mark on Middle School.

A and I enjoyed the freedom to go to Walmart and enjoy a fresh pretzel and drink without her having to share. It was so fabulous she said. Then Dad called at lunch time and invited us to meet him at the mall and have lunch at her favorite place and cash in that gift card she got for her birthday from us to Build A Bear (BAB).

She was so excited; Lunch at Burger King at the Mall had never been so good! She commented on how great it was that she picked BK as they were located just down the hall from BAB. Who knew?

Her new Scruffy Puppy in a Sleeping Beauty Pink Dress could not be any cuter. The fact that we got to see her face the whole time as she went about picking out just the right animal, outfit and shoes. Precious.

A with her new "Scruffy Puppy" giving it a bath and outside the store posing with the big Build A Bear and Annabell's Puppy House. A had picked the name herself and then later remembered that it was the same name as her Nana's doll that she still has from childhood!

Last Blast of Summer

School starts for the big kids on Monday. Just when the weather starts to heat up around here the school doors open. What's wrong with this picture?

We are trying our best to fill our days with as much for as possible before routine is forced upon us. While I love the new notebooks, pens and color coded calendars that a new school year brings, I've been loving summer this year.

We've spent countless hours at the pool, at the Lake House, and just hanging out. We've dined al fresco on our back deck, had friends over to play and C has played countless rounds of golf. We've enjoyed the summer and it's laid back attitude. No big plans, no huge responsibilities, nothing, Nada that could not be put off for another day. Just like Summer was intended.

I've been prompted lately in my heart to carry this summer attitude into my fall planning. To not over schedule. To not take on more volunteer jobs or responsibilities than I can handle. To enjoy my family and the season.

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With A red shirting kindergarten this year and C entering 7th grade, I'm beginning to realize that very shortly this season will come to an end. Next fall, I will have no one at home during the day with everyone off to school. I'll have plenty of time then to volunteer and do projects for church, school, or myself.

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This fall I want to have a little summer every week.

* A free day each week with A to play or go somewhere.

* Fall dinners al fresco on the deck with the deck lights on and the grill fired up.

* Evening games of soccer in the backyard or Scrabble contests over a bowl of popcorn

* New projects started on my knitting needles: felted purses, cable knit scarves and maybe just maybe I might think about sewing again.

* Teach A some reading basics and work on letters and sounds. She'll get some of this in preschool, but I'm thinking she could be reading by kindergarten if we worked at home too.

* Work with the Girl Scouts to give back to our community in some big way: I might even teach them to knit !

* Teach M how to latch hook. We have a pillow kit to start with.

* Challenge C to practice golf this fall so that he can beat his grandfather next spring.

* Encourage my kids to invite friends over more. I want to be a welcoming house. Less activities scheduled should free up time for more of this and give me time to make snacks and keep the house up and ready for visitors.

* Be consistent in my morning devotion time, don't just do my Beth Moore Bible Study actually spend time in the Word for the sake of growing rather than learning.

* Find time to have a date night once in awhile

* I'm looking forward to a new year. I know for some a new year starts in January but I also think of September as the beginning of a new year. I have my fresh Desk Calendar all started with perfect color coding and lots of open blanks that I'm hoping to keep that way!!
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Come on Fall Bring it On!!

Public School Christians

My kids go to our neighborhood public school, though we did not start out there. Our oldest goes to a middle school and the middle one goes to the elementary school just blocks from our home.

C started his Kindergarten at a small Christian School, but by Spring Break we had changed our minds. The teacher and the school did not work for us. Thus far, not realizing this problem sooner is one of my biggest parenting regrets. C was miserable and hated school. It is a rule, Kindergartners don't hate school!

We moved to our neighborhood elementary school in March of that year. The first day I could tell all was redeemed. C was a little evangelist at school. The first day he asked to pray before the snack. He was told he'd have to do it silently.

In First Grade, he started a Jesus club. He invited all his friends to join as long as they knew about Jesus. If they didn't know, he'd tell them all about Him. While the Jesus Club was shut down due to "rules" about non inclusive clubs (of course, C said anyone could join), it didn't stop his mother from starting a Bible Study with school moms that is still going strong some 5 years later.

Our family did not go into a Public School with the plan to revolt against the "worldly" view often expounded at the school. We didn't protest the fact that Christmas was not celebrated. We just continued to sign our cards "Merry Christmas" when we brought gifts for the teachers.

I decided the best way to make sure I wasn't offended by the Halloween party in the classroom would be to volunteer to be the room mother and watch the festivities up close and personal.

Yes, there have been times when I've been tempted to protest things taught about Holidays we don't celebrate, while they omit anything that might be considered "Christian" which is offensive to the PC crowd. Instead, I've learned to pick my battles and build relationships with teachers and administrators. This way, I can make my views known in a non confrontational way.

Through this, my kids have seen a world that does not always share our beliefs. They have learned that talking about God to others is always allowed, but that talking one-on-one and having a relationship with someone first is probably the best way to share our faith. They've learned to be bold and to stand up for their faith while still having a mom and dad watching their every move and making sure they are supported.

In many ways, I've found more Christian Friends for myself and my kids at the Public School than I did in 6 months at a Christian School. I've been bolder about seeking out like minded friends and so have my kids. I've found that there are a lot of Christians in the public school systems including many teachers, administrators, parents, and kids. They are being salt and light in a world often dark and abandoned.

Our family has been able to minister with other parents/families to hurting families in our school environment. Not boldly about Christ, but by being Jesus with skin on in today's world. Our kids have had opportunities to invite non-churched friends to youth group activities, summer VBS, and events at our church that otherwise they would not have been so exposed.

I realize that our family is blessed to be in a city and a school district that has conservative educational values. Textbooks and teaching subject for the most part are non offensive. I know that this could change and as we go up in grades I know that the Science curriculum and literature books might cause some further discussions. I'm OK with that. We know what we believe, we talk about it at home and our kids are equipped to stand up for what they believe or ask for help from us.

For now, I feel that we are like Esther. In the Public School for Such A Time as This....

C gave a speech this month in front of the entire 5/6 grade student body for Cultural Awareness Week. At first, I was surprised that my son, a white middle class suburban boy, would have any knowledge of Cultural Diversity. Yet, his speech was chosen from among his classmates by the teachers as the one that stood out. Amazingly, his speech mentions God and was not edited.

Here's an excerpt of the speech. I've changed a few words to protect people's identity.

At my years at ***, I have had many cultural experiences including a very special one, when I met Mrs. ****. Many of you probably know her, but what you might not know is that she is a missionary. When I heard about her orphanage in ****something inside me clicked. I started to think more about what I have to offer as opposed to what others have to offer me. I was very disappointed at the beginning of 5th grade because many of my elementary friends were on the opposite team as me. I have made many new friends and I have no regrets. Don’t get me wrong I still like my elementary friends, but I know that God put me on the “A” team instead of the “B” team for a special purpose. Part of that reason was to meet Mrs. ****.

When I heard this speech, tears rolled down my face. Not for how wonderful my son was, which he is, but for how wonderful God is that he uses a Public School teacher who just happens to be an Christian Missionary and FCA advisor in my son's life. God did put C in a certain teachers' classroom last year for a reason.

I think C is wondering now if you can you be a missionary and an Aeronautical Engineer at the same time? Who knows. Only God.